Every meaningful breakthrough in my business starts the same way. Just a couple of day ago I was sitting in the car and reflecting on this

It hit me that there’s a cycle I keep going through... and I’ve been through it enough times now to recognise the pattern.

So here how it goes roughly.

Phase 1: curiosity → frustration

First, I’m curious about solving the problem.

So I sit down and really think about how to solve it.

I try something — it doesn’t work. I try something else, maybe changing tactics slightly, tweaking positioning (if it’s marketing), or adjusting how I approach the problem.

Still nothing works.

I try a few more times, attempting things that might influence it to some extent. But nothing really happens

I get frustrated.

At some point, I realise this is a genuinely difficult challenge, something I’ve never had to solve before. It feels like a problem from the future. Something that, once solved, unlocks the next stage.

Phase 2: frustration → existential crisis

Then I start getting upset.

It even starts to feel existential.

I start wondering if I’m missing something obvious. If I’ve lost my edge. If there’s something fundamentally wrong that I’m not seeing.

I may even feel powerless for a while… maybe half a day, sometimes a few days.

Phase 3: existential crisis → “it’s just not that important”

Then I ultimately get tired of thinking about.

So I stop.

I realise I’ve taken the problem too close to heart and that I need distance.

I go for a walk, change context, focus on something else.

“Maybe it’s not such a big issue after all….?”

There are other things I could focus on, and that’s fine.

Phase 4: “it’s just not that important” → new POV

The energy comes back. I don’t feel powerless anymore.

Instead, curiosity returns. I start wondering if the problem can be approached in a completely different way.

I begin looking in new directions, speaking to people who’ve solved similar problems, or getting a fresh perspective on the business, long-term strategy, and everything around it. And then, almost suddenly, clarity appears.

I see what I need to do now…

Actually, it’s less about doing… At this phase I typically have 2 options to chose from:

option a) change how I think

option b) overcome a limiting belief that stops me from getting what I want

It’s usually option b.

With new clarity, action becomes easier. The direction feels more interesting, more exciting, and often simpler than I initially thought.

It’s not “frictionless”… challenges still exist, but it no longer feels like smashing my head against a wall.

It feels more like opening different doors, trying things, and seeing which one leads toward the outcome I want.

A fascinating cycle.

So when a problem starts feeling existential, it’s not a sign you’re failing. It’s a sign your current way of thinking has reached its limit. You likely need to detach and form an entirely new POV.

– Romans

Option 1

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Option 2

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